Post-Wedding Blues: Why you might feel flat after the best day ever (and how to bounce back!)
Post-Wedding Blues: What to do when you feel sad after your wedding day
You’ve floated down the aisle, said your vows through happy tears, shared a sweet kiss in front of your adoring and cheering crowd, danced until your feet were sore and rode off into the golden glow of married life.
And now… you're back home, in your PJs, with a fridge full of leftover wedding cake and the echo of “Can I get a BIG CHEER for our happy newlyweds!” ringing in your ears.
And you feel… kinda flat.
Dear newlyweds, welcome to post-wedding blues. It’s real, it’s common and it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you or your beautiful marriage. It just means your heart’s still catching up to the whirlwind that just was.
Photo Credit: Images by Lou
So, what is post-wedding blues?
Post-wedding blues is that feeling of sadness, emptiness or anticlimax that can sneak up on you after your wedding day. Relationship therapist Geoff Lamb puts it simply: it's that “flatness” that follows the high of all the attention, love and excitement. And psychosexual therapist Cate Mackenzie backs it up, this is more common than we give it credit for.
After all, you’ve spent months (or let’s be honest, perhaps years) planning the party of your life. You’ve had spreadsheets, Pinterest boards, late-night scrolling sessions, group chats, dress fittings and seating plan meltdowns. And then, it’s over in a flash! And you’re sitting there wondering if it’s socially acceptable to wear your wedding dress to Woolies just to keep the magic alive.
How do you know if you’ve got post-wedding blues?
Some signs to look out for:
Feeling sad or “blah” when you think about the wedding being over
Getting grumpy with your partner (and no, it’s not because they unpack the dishwasher wrong)
Feeling like life is boring, directionless or too normal
Scrolling through your wedding photos at 3am with a strange mix of joy and existential dread
Wondering why you’re not basking in post-nuptial bliss 24/7
Honestly, it might just feel like a little grey cloud is following you around where a big sparkly disco ball used to be.
Now, on an important note: if these feelings persist or worsen, or you’re struggling to get back to your usual self, please talk to a professional. You’re not alone, mental health care is self-care.
Photo Credit: Images by Lou
Why do we feel post-wedding blues?
It’s quite simple really. Weddings are intense. They’re emotional, theatrical, expensive, joyful, stressful and beautifully overwhelming. Your brain has been flooded with anticipation and adrenaline. And when that’s all gone, it’s not unusual to feel like you’re crashing back to earth with a champagne hangover and no maid of honour to pick up the pieces.
There are three main categories of post-wedding sadness I often hear from my beautiful couples, especially my brides:
The “That Wasn’t What We Planned”
On your wedding day, you dreamed of sun-drenched vows but instead, you got cyclone warnings (quite possible here on the Sunshine Coast!). Your cake was meant to be tiered perfection but sadly, it melted. Good old Aunty Deb did that thing again.
If your day didn’t go to plan, and let’s be honest here, something always goes pear shaped, it’s easy to ruminate. You’re not ungrateful, you’re just mourning the version of the day you imagined.
So, try this: Sit with your partner, go through your photos and find six things you absolutely loved. Focus on those. Talk about them. Laugh about them. Reclaim the joy.
The “Can We Do It Again?”
Your wedding was a 10/10. Your DJ nailed it, your mum cried at the right time, your outfits slayed and you’d do it all over again tomorrow. Except you can’t.
You’re grieving the end of something magical, and that’s okay.
So, try this: Recreate the energy in bite-sized pieces. Host a dinner party with your bridal party. Watch your wedding video with a bottle of bubbly. Put on your wedding playlist and dance in the lounge room in your PJs. The feeling you’re chasing isn’t your wedding, it’s the connection. And you can recreate that again and again, in all kinds of ways.
The “Now What?”
You’ve ticked off the wedding. And suddenly the to-do list is blank…and this one’s big. You’ve had a purpose, a project, a countdown. Now you’re wondering what’s next. This is the one that got me after my own wedding day!
So, try this: Use your wedding-planning superpowers and redirect them. Plan a holiday. Pick up a new hobby. Start a savings plan, or maybe start planning your next adventure, whether it’s a new home, travel, fur-babies or just a ‘just-because’ dinner party every month.
Remember: your wedding is not the finale. It’s the sparkling opening act to an even more beautiful chapter!
Photo Credit: Images by Lou
How to deal with post-wedding blues (without planning another wedding)
Talk to your partner: Be honest. Say “Hey, I’m feeling a little flat now that our big day is over.” Vulnerability is healthy and chances are they’re feeling a little flat too.
Share your day: Tell the funny stories. Post the best photos. Bask in all the wedding day glory. You’re allowed to celebrate even after the day has passed.
Celebrate your marriage, not just your wedding: Take the same energy you put into planning your big day and invest it into building a life you love together. Date nights. Weekend getaways. Couch cuddles. All the good stuff!
Create new traditions: Whether it’s an annual anniversary bash, a monthly wedding memory night, or a scrapbook you build together, find ways to keep the magic alive in small, joyful ways.
At the end of the day, your wedding was a magnificent day, but it’s your marriage that will be full of thousands of magical, mundane, emotional, funny and perfectly imperfect moments. And that is something to get very excited about.
So go gently with yourself. You’re not broken, you’re just adjusting to this next exciting chapter in your journey together. And remember, you’re not alone. There’s a whole community of cheese-toastie-eating, pyjama-wearing, wedding-photo-scrolling newlyweds out there feeling exactly the same as you. I was one of them once!
Photo Credit: Images by Lou
If you’re already parents: Navigating post-wedding blues with kids in tow
If you're entering married life already juggling parenting duties, you might be wondering why you're feeling flat after your wedding when there's already so much love and chaos in your world. The truth is, getting married can still feel like a huge emotional shift, even if you've shared a life (and kids) together for years.
Sometimes, it's not about what's changed logistically, but emotionally. You may have expected a fresh wave of excitement or a deeper sense of togetherness after saying “I do,” but instead you're back to school runs, snack negotiations and trying to remember where you left the dummy. And that’s totally normal.
Here’s what can help:
Give yourselves space to reconnect — Even short, intentional moments together can go a long way. You don’t need a romantic getaway (though hey, if the grandparents are free…).
Acknowledge the milestone — Just because you were already a family doesn’t make your wedding less significant. It was a big deal. It still is.
Communicate what’s shifted — Talk about how the wedding (and the lead-up) made you feel. Sometimes it’s not sadness, it’s emotional fatigue or the natural comedown after a big high.
Marriage adds a new layer to your family story and it’s okay if it takes a little while to find your rhythm again. You’ve built something beautiful and this next chapter with your kids is just as meaningful.
Feel free to share your story in the comments below so we can uplift and support each other!
BIG hugs,
Your Celebrant, Stacey x
(who’s always here for post-wedding pep talks and cake therapy)